Tuesday, January 28, 2014
Aah, the first official day of the Sprint Media Tour. Oh, I mean the NASCAR Sprint Media Tour hosted by Charlotte Motor Speedway. Hey, it says so on this piece of paper I now have, and I want to be a rule follower after all.
So my day started out with a wrestling match between me and the in-room coffee amenities. Why infusing my body with caffeine has to be so difficult is beyond me. I am proud to say I won after attacking the package with my pen, and proving once again that -- wait for it -- the pen is mightier than well, maybe not a sword, but a coffee packet.
I learned some very valuable things today, like the governor of North Carolina Pat McCrory once sneaked into a race at Charlotte Motor Speedway without paying. Seriously, dude. Did you think that was going to impress a bunch of hard-nosed media folks? There's a guy by the name of Anthony Weiner who can help you with creating a bad boy image, if you are so inclined.
Another thing I learned was that the media corps is not drinking the NASCAR Kool-Aid when it comes to changing the Chase rules. It should be interesting to see how this storyline evolves as the week progresses. NASCAR is taking the weeny way out by making the official announcement of changes on the last day of the tour. This is the equivalent of the president making an announcement of an unpopular law on a Friday. Nice.
Another thing I was thinking a lot about today was shoes. Yes, the alpha personality talk about Stewart-Haas Racing was interesting, but how does their footwear stack up? Well, Danica Patrick is the top scorer here with her adorable spiked black stilettos. I seriously almost asked her what size shoe she wore. Second place goes to Kevin Harvick for a very stylish ankle-high boot. And please, someone tell Tony Stewart to stop wearing those "priest" black oxfords. Somewhere there is a priest who really needs those shoes, Tony, so please, please surrender them now! Or do five Hail Marys. Your choice. Oh, and by the way Tony, stop using the word "exciting." You used it 22 times today during your interview. Yikes!
Finally, the biggest walkaway today was that NASCAR is wasting its time on trying to come up with a revamped Chase format. What will really make a difference in the sport and gain international interest and respect is getting a top designer, say Kenneth Cole, Louis Vuitton, Calvin Klein or Ralph Lauren, to redesign the firesuit. No, really - I think this could work.
This brilliant nugget came to me today as I passed Kurt Busch as he was making his way to a broadcast interview. I had to take a second look as the firesuit looked like it belonged to a bad Elvis impersonator or a Vegas lounge act -- not in a good way. Though I was embarrassed for him, Kurt did his best to pull it off. The smile he gave me didn't hurt either. However, now I can't shake the lyrics of Elvis' "Burning Love." Great. Just what I needed.